‘…Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and
with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy
neighbour as thyself.’ Luke 10:27
For years I had tried to serve God the way He desired and for
years I failed, easily slipping back to the world and all its empty
promises. I read the Bible and I knew
what was right and wrong in His eyes but it was as though, no matter how hard I
tried, I just couldn’t do it. I gave Him
lip-service but not heart-service. I
remember getting frustrated and thinking that it was impossible, but that longing
to serve Him wholeheartedly remained, so I forged on. Then one day I prayed a bold prayer.
Standing in my back yard, gazing up at the blue sky, I got
real with Him. My prayer went something
like this, “God, Your word says that I need to love You and be willing to
choose You first, but God, I don’t love you so please help me.” I stood silent as that prayer wafted up to
the heavens. I’d like to tell you that I
was different from that day on and I loved Him with my whole heart, but I
wasn’t and I didn’t.
Not long after I sent my request Heavenward, my life took an
unimaginable turn and I was alone in a self-made prison of despair. I’d go to work then come home and sit in my
back yard and drink, cry and curse, but I’d pray as well. I begged God not to let me go because I knew
that the road I found myself traveling down was one that would plunge me deeper
into darkness. Yet day after day I drank
my sorrows and day after day I begged God not to let me go. This went on for years. God met me where I was day after day. He was my constant and it was during that
time I grew to love Him. We spent every
day together, me begging, He listening and loving. He carried me through. I learned much about Him. Every promise in His word that says that He
loves us unconditionally…true, that He will never leave us nor forsake us…true,
that He sticks closer than a brother…true…every promise…true! I am a living testament that ALL His promises
are true.
My walk with Him is not perfect, I am human and I do stupid
things, but He loves me back to that right path, the one that He has laid out
before me and I willingly choose Him. I
don’t want to hurt Him or disappoint Him.
My love for Him has changed me for the better—I can honestly say that I
love myself and others, as well.
I look back with gratitude on that dark road that I travelled. It wasn’t easy, but I learned much and
wouldn’t change a thing. He desires for
you to love Him with your whole heart, ask Him to help you. Spend every single day drawing closer to Him,
He is as close as the whisper of His name.
He will show Himself faithful, every single time. Be blessed beautiful people!